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It's so great to see you again

You can't measure something. Like this in time.

Between you and sex is clothes.

There's a series of steps. From her bed to the front door. Bam! Out of there. Next! But I think you start to recover. The moment you meet that person who gets you back in the game.

Some douchey guy I hooked up with left it here.

This is the story of how I met that person.

TED: Well, it appears our sweet,

Now, kids, if you want to go swimming, You don't just dive in.

Two out of three times?

First, you dip your toe in the water. You check the temperature. See how it feels. And then you slowly wade in. I got left at the altar a month ago. Or, you know, cannonball. It was a complete disaster and ever since then, I haven't been able to even look at another woman. Except for the old lady on the subway.

I don't want to do anything stupid to jeopardize it.

Who break-dances for nickels. I don't look at her that way. I just look at her.

I mean, it's an old lady break-dancing. And she is good. I'm going to give her a dollar next time. Hey, let's pretend I just said this:. These elevator rides have been the highlight of my week, And I'd love to see you again Friday night. Not in the elevator. At a rtaurant, a nice one. What do you say?

The same edition I'd had since college.

NARRATOR: Kids, I walked in on a lot of crazy stuff. At the old apartment over the years. Sorry, guys. I'm just going to go with a bowl of fruit. It's been 12 minutes! Drop it! You first!

Ike, why are you pointing your gun at me? Don't use my name! Put the guns down, now!

But one of the craziest things I ever walked in on. Happened when I was roommates with your Aunt Robin. Who are you?!

I had to prove that as scary as it was to be dating again,

What you doing, Mitch? Oh, you must be the roommate. I'm on a date with Robin.

She had to step outside to take a call. I guess her cell phone doesn't work in here. OhRobin, uh, didn't use the super secret signal. We-we put this old takeout menu on the doorknob. Place went out of business.